[ 2 min read ]
Diary of an artist, Friday, March 15, 2019
Woke up 3:20 am
What if I had a hit and after that I had 100 answers, posts, books (pieces of writing) which weren’t a hit? Am I or am I not a successful human being? Was I a successful human being and then stopped being one? Will I be a successful human being again, as soon as something I wrote will become the next hit?
Can I cheat the system by stopping? Will I be remembered as someone who produced something which was a hit, a successful writer, and who could have had many hits after that (if he kept at it)? Such would probably be the assumption. A prodigious young (or not so young) talent ready to be discovered by the world.
What if I died suddenly a couple of weeks after the world or some part of it went crazy about my piece? My first piece, or one of my first pieces. Would I exist in the collective consciousness (or maybe it’s better to call it imagination) as someone who was a great writer or thinker (or more broadly — a successful human being), this prodigious young (or not so young) talent, taken form this world way too soon? What if I lived another three years produced a dozen of books, none of which would become a hit? Then what? Would people say that the conclusion that I was successful was premature? Probably. Some would definitely say that.
Freaking tricky, isn’t it? This “success”.
So maybe it’s better to forget entirely about becoming successful, in the conventional sense I mean. Redefining success is probably the smartest thing a human being can do. Seems like it.
Reading (since my last diary entry):
Fire in the Belly: The Life and Times of David Wojnarowicz (20 min, on scribd app).
Audiobooks (since my last diary entry):
Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari (20 min, on scribd app). Second reading.
YouTube videos and movies (since my last diary entry):
Studs Terkel: Listening to America (on HBO Go) Finished it.
The Zen Diaries of Garry Shandling. Part 2 (on HBO Go) Finished it.
Music for this writing session: Coffee Table Jazz (playlist on spotify)