The distinction between a “normal” family or life and something which isn’t a “normal” family or life is a flawed concept | 700
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Diary of an artist, Sunday, July 14, 2019
Woke up 5:30 am
What I meant by my yesterday’s post was that we all live in some culture (one or another) which tells us (shows us / teaches us) what is and what isn’t “normal”. By the same token, it tells us what is and what isn’t weird / sick.
But, as I wrote yesterday, it’s just a convention which formed in a certain culture (group of people living in a certain place in a certain way). It is not some universal law, like the law of nature. It’s just a convention. If so it can be ignored.
I can’t ignore (choose not to obey) the laws of physics for example. I can try to harness them for my purposes but I can’t just say that they don’t exist and they will suddenly disappear (or, to be more precise, will suddenly not apply to me). As a regular human being (not some scientist working on something that might not be ready in our era, or that might never be ready — ready to replace the current order of things) I can’t ignore (choose not to obey / have a different idea) how new plants appear and grow or how human beings or other species are born and how they then function.
A convention which is present (was formed) in a given culture, as the idea what is and what isn’t “normal” or “sick”, on the other hand, is always something I can choose to ignore. Of course, if I’ll choose to ignore a going convention I’ll be immediately weird to the majority of people living in this culture. To those to whom ignoring those conventions is unthinkable. To those who don’t approve of those who don’t respect (who don’t live by) a certain convention. To those who are so used to obeying (living by) a certain convention that they would never even think of ignoring it. To all such people those who ignore a going convention are weird people to say the least. They’re probably even mad the people who ignore a going convention.
I can choose to ignore this silly idea that we’re supposed to be “normal” people living in “normal” families, and living so called “normal” lives. That that’s something we should strive for, or wish. Wishing it is like wishing that on all your summer or winter vacations the weather will always be just the way you wish it was. Or that the weather will always help you grow your plants (have a huge crop). We don’t control the weather so we must accept what comes. Because that’s just the way it is in this world. We can try to outsmart the weather in some way, but A/ it is not always possible, and B the cost of it is usually high (definitely way higher than just relying on the weather which is given). Or we can pray for the weather we want. But what if someone else wants a different weather and also chooses to pray?
Usually when there are diseases or hardships which are greater than usual, or when something extremely unpleasant, unwanted, or unorthodox happened in our families (parents split up, mom or dad came out as a gay person after 30 years of marriage, we were born with some kind of disability, our child was born with some kind of disability, etc.) we wouldn’t call it a “normal” situation. We’re not used to label things like that “normal”. In my culture (and I think in most cultures) we’re used to treat such events as not “normal”. And when such events happen in our lives we often say that we wish we could live a “normal” life. Which is nonsense to me as I believe that the distinction between a “normal” family or life and something which isn’t a “normal” family or life is a flawed concept.
Music for this writing session: Max Richter (on spotify)