Before 30. After 30. Part 6
Before 30. After 30. Part 8

Before 30. After 30. Part 7

[ 4 min read ]

I didn’t finish my thought yesterday. I said that mere citing statistics (research results) is not enough.
Statistically it can be true that 80% of a person’s greatest achievements in life happen before the age of 35.
Statistically it can be true that 80% of life’s most defining moments take place by age 35.
Statistically it can be true that eight out of ten of the decisions and experiences and “Aha!” moments that make your life what it is will have happened by your mid-30s.
Statistically it can be true that 2/3 of lifetime wage growth happens during the first 10 years of a career.
Statistically it can be true that once you’re in your 30’s or 40’s, it gets harder and harder to reinvent yourself.

But why exactly is that? What causes those results?

It’s like citing a research which shows that statistically people who went to college fare way better in life than those who didn’t go to college, and telling people “See, that’s why studying (or rather graduating from college) matters”.
Most people think that knowing those results (statistics) is enough. They don’t need any more information. For them it’s clear. You went to college, your life will probably not suck shit (you will earn more, your love life and your family life will be better, your happiness level will be way higher, everything will be better). You didn’t go to college, your life will probably suck shit (you will earn way less, your love life and your family life will be much worse, your happiness level will be way lower — there will be problems which those with college degrees and good careers never experience, etc.).

But almost nobody will go a step further and ask, Ok, statistically people who went to college fare way better in life than those who didn’t go to college, but why exactly is that? Is it because college is this magic bullet which solves most of adult life problems by setting people up for success (giving them a good career which is the starting point of a decent life — according to this narrative that’s exactly what is it), OR maybe it’s because almost everybody in the society believes in the importance of a college diploma in today’s world (because that’s what they’ve been taught growing up, and what research after research confirms), and thus those who, for various reasons, didn’t go to college, or didn’t finish college, or who never had the early life opportunities middle class children had, conclude that they will never amount to anything in life and give up on themselves, OR maybe because such people didn’t even need to conclude anything, because they’d been conditioned to think of themselves as losers, inferior breed of human beings, because that’s the mindset of people among whom they grew up (especially their parents and other members of their family).

And if those who cite various researches wanted to take that one more step and dig deeper, they’d realize how much of it is a self-fulfilling prophecy (people giving up on themselves, parents and families giving up on the children, thanks to how they were conditioned to think of themselves and everybody without college education and early life opportunities), and not, as those who cite such researches mindlessly assumed, due to the fact that those people didn’t have college education or early life opportunities.

Statistically 80% of a person’s greatest achievements in life happen before the age of 35.
Statistically 80% of life’s most defining moments take place by age 35.
Statistically eight out of ten of the decisions and experiences and “Aha!” moments that make your life what it is will have happened by your mid-30s.
Statistically 2/3 of lifetime wage growth happens during the first 10 years of a career.
Statistically once you’re in your 30’s or 40’s, it gets harder and harder to reinvent yourself.

Yeah, but why exactly? Is it because it is what it is, OR because growing up in a certain culture (among people with a certain mindset, conditioned to think a certain way) we had been conditioned to think the same way (in other words, we had been brainwashed to think a certain way). And then this way of thinking prevents us (the vast majority of people in our society) from believing that we can still change things, do something about our lives, even in our mid to late 30s and beyond (in our 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s, even 90s).

Most assume (because that’s the prevailing mindset of people) that whatever it is they achieved / built in the first decade or 15 years of their adult lives shapes / defines the rest of it. And thanks to what do they assume it? Messages that tell you how insanely important your 20s are. That nothing in your entire life will be as important as your 20s. That you decide your adult life in your 20s.