As an artist or a writer you need to believe in yourself first. Part 1
Do you need to believe something will eventually come out of what you do? Part 1

As an artist or a writer you need to believe in yourself first. Part 2

[ 2 min read ]

So if you count on your family’s unwavering support and faith in you and your abilities, if you depend on it, then you will very likely have a rude awakening.
The same is true for spouses and other people from our families who didn’t know us as kids. Why? The same mechanism is in play. They also believe in children way more eagerly than they believe in adults.

If an adult has been doing something for a long time, and it didn’t produce a conventional success, then it’s pretty obvious to everybody that this adult isn’t going to make it. Nobody is willing to believe that he or she will still make it big one day.

They will welcome it (your conventional success) eagerly when it happens (as most people do — it is not a special achievement to believe in something when it’s the fact, and most people love conventional success and they love to have some connection with those who achieved it), but until then…, well, you will probably have to rely mainly on your own faith in your abilities. Very rarely they will be eager to treat you as their beloved sport club which they support always, regardless of the results. They will never treat you the way they would treat their beloved sport club or artist (singer, actor) because you’re the family, and with family it’s different.

In a family most support only children and they always root for them (because it’s normal, and easy), just as it is the norm in most families that by the time people are in their mid 30s other people know who is average, who a winner and who a loser. So if you think that someone from your family will be willing to wait for your conventional success until your 60s, or 90s, or that he or she will entertain the thought that a day may come in a distant future when you will achieve conventional success posthumously, then you’re a real dreamer.

So what kind of conclusion will they draw from it? That you shouldn’t do this. That you should probably be doing something else. What? They don’t know exactly. Probably they’d say “Something realistic. Not this bullshit you’ve been doing up until now.”.
“You’re being delusional”, is the other sentence you’ll very likely hear from them.

Why will they say all those things to you? Because they honestly don’t believe something will come out of it. They think it isn’t worth the time and effort. They know it. They probably subconsciously want to help you. Or maybe even consciously. They want you to succeed. Succeed in the conventional way.