[ 3 min read ]
What Gary Vaynerchuk (whom I consider a modern day thinker by the way — he’s not just a brilliant entrepreneur and social media genius, he uses his brain the way a thinker does) said we must do in order to be able to enjoy our lives (especially be happy with what we do day in day out professionally) should make us completely immune to the idea of conventional success.
He says that we shouldn’t give a fuck what other people (including our parents and other family members) think or say about us and our ideas, plans, beliefs, our entire life philosophy, and that we should instead concentrate on our work, (which means we must enjoy the process so much that we also don’t give a fuck about recognition, accolades, awards, our parents or other family members telling us that they’re proud — in other words about the conventional meaning of success).
We must stop giving a fuck about those things in order to be able to stay in the game long enough. And what does long enough mean? Long enough means a decade or more (sometimes even three or more decades), which is the amount of time it takes to become successful in the conventional sense (get the recognition, accolades, fame, money, awards, finally hear from our parents or other family members that they’re very proud of us). All those things you don’t give a damn about anymore because you reprogrammed your brain (after having listened to people like Gary or myself). Actually, if you’ve been paying attention you should consider no longer giving a damn whether or not you get those things from people your most important achievement and the foundation on which your internal peace and happiness (or, if you like, your joy of life) rests. The paradox of it is that you can consider it a success when you no longer give a damn about success (the conventional success, the success most people in this world dream about — recognition, accolades, fame, money, awards, finally hearing from our parents or other family members that they’re very proud of us).
Now, in order to be able to enjoy and appreciate the recognition, accolades, fame, money, awards, and the fact that our parents or other family members finally told us that they’re so proud of us (for which we waited years or decades, because someone told us that it may take so long), we need to A/ care what other people think or say about us (return to our default setting — when we care about all those things), and B/ believe that the conventional success is what matters most (that it is the pinnacle of your entire existence, that this is the thing you should chase in life and wait for, that you should give a damn about it — also return to our default settings).
It makes no sense! Forget about the conventional success (stop giving a damn about it because it is not what makes people happy — loving the process, that’s what makes people happy) in order to be able to stay in the game long enough to finally achieve the conventional success. The kind of success you no longer give a damn about. The very thing you’ve been warned not to give a damn about. The very thing which (when planted in your head) can very easily spoil the joy of life. The very thing which turns the journey into waiting and more often than not makes people extremely anxious and envious and entitled and disappointed, and bitter.